yea so….a little behind in my Japanese class. =( On top of that… i am pretty tired, and i havent had anything to eat today. blaaaaaah.

Sensei is explaining to the class to to talk about animate and inanimate objects…..you know what? never mind. it would be too hard and take to long to explain haha.

now that i have my life in order….i guess i should redirect some of my attention to my studies in school. however transferring only SOME of my attention is something that i have never been good at…..ill update you readers(if i have any haha) in 2 weeks.

Of recent….ive been making INCREDIBLE progress in my passions. I heard from one of my friends that another friend of mine said that, “It’s like a switch went off in Jared’s head!” Hearing that made my heart warm =). My friendships have gotten stronger. My family life has had more posotive progress recently than it ever has before. And i feel less stressed, and that i can function as a normal person….FINALLY!!! I have solidified my beliefs, continue to gain understanding, and more importantly…applied that knowledge and turned it into wisdom.

However, of late i have been…..reminiscent. i find myself dwelling on past relationships (mostly with the female gender) and on the friends ive had throughout my life that i have no further contact. i know it was my choice to terminate my association with said people, and it has been more than beneficial for me. But i cant help wishing that those people and I were still friends.

For example….for those who are married. I assume( since i have yet to get married) that when a married one is physically separated my distance and contact from his or her mate….and sence of lonelyness or emptyness MUST be there. However they take comfort knowing that soon they will have their loved one back in their arms.

How am i suppost to react, knowing that i will most likely never come in contact with my old friends ever again? Or that if i do, it will be a quick exchange of, “Hey how ya doin?” and a ” Not much, how about you?” type of encounter?

I find the only way to cope is to forget these people as quickly as possible and move on untill the next time i feel….sentimental. Does this make me shallow? all i know is that everytime i tell myself to forget….i feel like i tear a piece of my soul away…..
-food for thought

*wakes up* …half eaten muffin on my desk. FAIL.

i am not a morning person. when i heard my alarm(6:30am), i threw it to the other side of the room so i could continue sleeping. hahaha. thats what i call weak will power. but im up. ^_^.

today’s tuesday….a school day. ive got my emt class out at santa rosa jc (windsor campus) from 1pm-4pm (both the best and the worst time for a class. its easy to be on time and pay attention vs. fraggles up the rest of the day). its an awesome course. besides the bookreading, its the best class ive ever taken. i think its gonna help me in more than just medic knowledge too. its para-military regiment, rules and regulations… for anything else i would laugh at these so called manners. however i will be involved in life threatening situations, and its good to have so form of structure in one’s life. getting tazered is the one thing im not looking foward to. that and being sprayed in the face with mace. ugh.

so. 15 min to 8am and im feelin great. i think im going to grab somem grub and finish some hw i slacked off(now i hate myself). im thinkin cereal {cherrios, wheaties, and rice crispies mixed together} and i might even do some pancakes. gotta keep that ‘healthy’ factor in there. untill next time.

Owari

yea so…..first post. absolutely no clue what to say. i guess i could say whats going on. currently watching Nickelodeon’s Avatar: The Last Airbender, while eagerly anticipating the upcoming movie based on it….. just caught myself just sitting and watching the show in the middle of this post hahah. i get distracted easily, waaay to easily.

ive decided to try and go healthy. not all crazy nutjob, but to better my physical, and mental well being. ive noticed that my attitude towards life in general has been more on the negative side, and that causes loads of unnecessary stress. so for the next 6 months to a year, soda, energy drinks, all nighters, junk food, red meat, and similar items are off menu. In its place i plan to drink only water, eat only and more of top performance aiding type foods, and have a scheduled weekly workout. (lets see how long this lasts hahaha)

alrighty well time to finish my muffin and this ep. of avatar and go to bed.
to all you night owls out there…stay cool.
Owari.